Filed under Barcelona

Spontaneous Upheaval

(Written six months after moving to Spain). When you move to another country, you move through a couple of stages of – let’s say appreciation – for your new home. The first stage is the ethrallment of…

love at first sight

…when everything seems fresher and more beautiful than it was at home.  Balconies, streets and people drinking coffee are scenes so picturesque that they seem to have been invented only yesterday.  The oddly strange new names for things and little quirky customs like having to weigh your own fruit at the supermarket are new and intesting.  Accents on vowels, squiggles above letters and people rolling their ‘r’s are the cutest things since you yourself were born.

After enthrallment comes…

awareness

…around about two months in, you’ll experience one or two reality checks.  Due to the physical and emotional upheaval of finding yourself somewhere to live and a person willing to pay you to work, you’ll probably find that you’ve contracted some sort of heinous flu, or at least, an odd tendency to break out in allergic reactions when faced with food that you used to eat abundantly – meaning that a visit to the doctor will be essential.  No longer cute, the doctor’s constant ‘r’ rolling and your own recent arrival in the country simply mean that you can’t easily communicate, and you end up leaving with a prescription for something that may or may not help you and a pissed off expression usually reserved for wild boar, or new mothers.   Set back number three comes in the form of…

financial shock

…your new home is a fair whack more expensive that your previous, which is something you were incapable of appreciating while your faculties were more involved in appreciating balconies, narrow cobblestoned streets, the proximity of sea and mountains and the ridiculous hairstyles paraded in these parts.  But your current reality of rice and onions with the occastional tin of tuna mixed in are no longer quite so delicious.  Of course, nothing would fix this as quickly as half an avocado and a squeeze of lemon spread on real grainy bread – but avocados sell for what you’d expect to get for you kidney, and the locals are yet to wake up to the fact that grainy bread is not a luxury that can be happily replaced by white bread bubbles. After a couple of reality checks and the unsightly period of awareness comes…

confusion

…bound to happen somewhere within your first six months, confusion is a moment when you realise that you brought yourself with youto this new place.  Life came with you too, and didn’t read the invitation you sent it that read ‘only awesomeness please’.  You have an irrational cry or two at home spurred by something idiotic like there being no milk, or being tired, or not understanding the shop assistant when she asked you if you had a Mercadona frequent customers’ card.  You try to blame it on your period and then realise that it’s not the right time of the month for that, setting you off down another teary track where you scream silently at yourself for being in such a beautiful place, doing what you always wanted to do and feeling like all you want to do is eat a bar of chocolate and go to sleep for the next two months.  Confusion is the period when ‘living the dream’ turns into simply ‘living’ and you realise that wherever you are, people still have the same problems…they’re just in another language, making it all the harder to rant about them. Confusion lasts about as long as it takes to make an awesome friend or two, and is followed not by a lightning bolt of clarity/epiphany style revelation of ‘this is what it’s all about’ complete with the booming voice of reason…but with…

life…just life

…and it’s great and complete and boring and fabulous and sometimes makes you want to kill it and it’s hilarious and tiring and not always wondrously financial – but you’re here, and you made it.

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Of Food and Flatmates

So, to have a very Carrie Bradshaw moment, after moving into a temporary studio apartment in the centre of Madrid, I’ve gotten to thinking.  “Is this the height of coolness, or a desperate attempt to live a life that I’m not yet equipped to live?”

The apartment is very cute; wonderful for a single girl to enjoy and call her own.  It’s a split room job, polished floors and high ceilings, a faux-leather sofa and a wall made entirely of shelving (enough for even the most rampant trinket horder to stash all her bits and pieces).  There are several lighting options to suit mood, and a balcony at the height of the young tree outside.  True, I’d change the pitch black entrance hallway before the front door, my kitchen wouldn’t be in a cupboard, and my shower would be big enough to shave comfortably in; but as this is not a place where I’ll live for ever, those are things that I can forgive.

View from my temporary haven's window. So easy to be a voyeur in Spain...

The first night I was here, I decided not to eat, and instead filled what space was left in the wardrobe (my friend has a lot of clothes), with the contents of my bag.  The next day, I headed out the front door, strolled past the fountained plaza and as yet unopened bars and cafés near it, and went in search of sustinence.  Coffee first, and then food.

Coming home, and beginning to fill my fridge with my first food purchases, I had a thought.

“That was expensive, for not much reward.”

That is to say, I’d brought home the bare necessities (cereal, milk, rice, pasta, veggies and…tuna – yes, again tuna!) and had been forced to hand over 20€ without even trying.

Now, I’m not a brand girl (except for chocolate and coffee) and believe what my mother always told me; that all over the world, there are factories where the same products exit via two doors.    One door, grey and boring for the black and white no name brands to come out, and the other, a sparkly pink door with it’s own personal fairy lit marching band, where the glittery name brands exit and are stamped with an inflated price of their own.  This may or may not be a slightly cheesed up version of my mother’s advice, but the point still stands.  The morning in question, my first shopping outing in Madrid, I had entered in Día (known cheap-o supermarket) and had not even indulged in farmer’s market, organic produce and Kellogg’s cereal.  The milk was UHT (like all milk is in Spain, but that’s another complaint) and the pasta was certainly not made in Italy, nor had any pretence at all of having been.  Neither had I splurged on wine, or chocolate, or fruit, or the saucepan and dishwashing liquid that I’d seen my little flat had lacked.  That would all have to come later.

After observing my not even full bar fridge for a moment or two, I became aware of a little voice whispering at my shoulder.

“It’s because you’re single.”

“Pardon, little voice?”

“You’re buying for one person.”

“Well, what do you expect?  That I buy for you too?  Or the family I hope to have someday?”

Sadly, the little voice was right.  Eating for one, and not eating crap, is not cheap.  You can buy all the rice, potatoes, salt and garlic that you want, sure.  But once you have the idea to dress it up a little with something green, it’s time to say adiós to loose change paying for the weekly shop.

I, anyway, can’t actually do a weekly shop, as I eat vastly more than a rabbit does, and so in shopping for only a few days, already come home lugging a few bags as it is.  In some share houses, my biceps haven’t had this work out, as I’ve shared food, and thus had help with the lugging of bags.

Upon leaving home, I moved in with Kieran, a excellent friend who also turned out to be an excellent flatmate (these are more difficult to find then they may seem).  We had a shared interest in hungover underwear shopping, blue chaise lounges, the blue and grey monochrome of our neighbour’s washing line, eggs for breakfast, strong tea drunk on the back deck and hunting rogue mice that were invincible to any bait.  And importantly, we only fought one and a half times.  The first, when he criticised an outfit that I was going to wear; after which I told him to shove it and he would not, where upon I reacted by hitting him with a boot.  And the second; a half-hearted moment when I was making curry the way I’d always seen it made, and he got just a teensy bit uppity about my mum’s quick and busy method before spouting a small monologue about India and insisting that he continue.  The fact that his version was light years superior is beside the point.

Kieran's alphabet magnets were awesome. Beat pen and paper anyday.

Anyway, we shared food.  And it made shopping easier and cheaper and more fun to return from the shops together, working our abs by tensing and relaxing them as we lifted shopping bags like dumbells.  Sharing food only became just a teensy bit of a problem when the fact raised its ugly head that I ate just a teensy bit more than he.  Which only came to light one day when I ate a teensy bit of what was his share of some leftovers we’d cooked together.  Which I think was in fact his aforementioned superior curry; thus adding fuel to the half-hearted fire.  From which point I simply ate less, that in itself being an effort I must say.  But all this did explain how it was that he could fit into my jeans without any effort, while I had to suck in a little to do the same.

My next house was an airy flat of a minimum of five, maximum of seven in Barcelona, myself at one point being the only un-Brazilian.  We didn’t share anything, but occasionally cooked together before enjoying an impromptu 5am mojito.  These flatmates taught me how many carrots should ideally go in a carrot and chocolate cake (eight or nine), how to make empadão (a chicken dream) and, finally and most importantly for humankind, where I learned how to cook rice without either searing the pot black, or ending up with a lump of indistinguishable grey smush.  Nothing scary food-wise happened in this flat, except for when Thorsten, the German counterpart, brought home a leg of jamón one day and we all learned how to carve off little slices with the strange sort of long, un-serrated knives that evidently one is to use.  I wasn’t a fan of this piece of pig in my kitchen (its hoof still attached), as it smelt and tasted as I imagined (and still imagine) human flesh must smell and taste.

5am mojitos in jars. Scary jamón in background.

House number three.  I had my second, and equally successful attempt at moving in with already made friends – the lovely Mandy and Kelsey.  Mandy and I met in Spanish class, and had already bonded over food in a major way, her serving me a sort of mini dinner once or twice a week between her classes, and before my skipping off to serve beer in large quantities to drunken Englishmen on La Rambla.  During our time as flatmates, I learned how to make potatoes interesting, and she learned that potatoes are not, in fact, a “free” vegetable.

This sad fact came to her one night when at around 10pm, after returning from giving a late class and having eaten a sizeable plate of her “pink pasta” (spiral pasta, butter and tomato sauce), she returned to the living room with a plate of freshly fried and salted potato cubes.  While trying to decipher the Catalán news program on TV Kelsey and I had heard them spitting away in the kitchen and thought it better not to ask.  But ask we had to, as Mandy happily sat down to eat her second massive helping of carbohydrates in almost as many minutes.

“What are you eating?”

“Potatoes.”

“Didn’t you just eat pasta?”

“Yep.”

“Potatoes are like pasta, you know.  It’s a huge source of carbs.”

“What do you mean?  It’s a vegetable.  Veggies are free food.”

“Who said that?”

“Everyone knows that.”

“Yeah, but potatoes don’t count.”

This went on for some time, and finally became a world-shattering realisation for Mandy of the variety that I don’t really think will ever allow her to return to her life of old.  Sort of like for me, when at 5 years old I had a nightmare where in Michael Jackson was waiting for me in the darkened spare bedroom at my grandparents’, before chasing me through their house.  (Soon after, I learned that he had not always been the translucent, white, destroyed of nose specimen I’d grown so used to seeing.  And my world hasn’t been the same since).

Old flatties, Brazilian and otherwise...

Kelsey too had a special relationship with food in our house, involving mostly her amazing ability to whip up delicious hors d’œuvres suitable for the sort of entertaining we didn’t yet consider ourselves old enough to partake in.  Of special note were her honey-roasted tomatoes with balsamic vinegar, and a certain dip which remains curious to this day; namely cream cheese, purple grapes and coriander leaves, sliced and mixed together.  Kelsey also introduced quimwah (a grain which I can’t spell) to my life, taught me how to make salad dressings from scratch, and was the author of some amazing, yet odd molasses and chocolate chip cookies (made, or not made as the case may be, for the arrival of a very dashing Venezuelan one lazy Sunday afternoon).

Incredible as her cooking skills could be, Kelsey herself ate simply.  She was often seen staring at her shelf in the fridge – remembering yet again that she’d forgotten to go shopping – before taking out an apple, a block of cheese and a knife.  She’d be found moments later, sitting on the couch and expertly shearing off slices of each, before eating them in a sort of apple-cheese-apple sandwhich.  Sometimes, cheese-apple-cheese.

I was reminded off all this as I lugged home my first shop, before returning to the supermarket to lug home the saucepan and cleaning materials I lacked.  I was actually very lucky that month.  A friend not currently in Madrid was letting me use her cute little studio for a relative pittance; paying basically the bills themselves.  This was such a gift, that it was actually making me a little lazy.  Lying in, making breakfast slowly before deciding whether or not to go out and achieve anything that particular day.  Soon, I realised that my diary had filled up with trips here and there out of the city, and I hadn’t yet put any elbow grease into finding myself a place for when my friend returned.

True, I wasn’t going to find myself a place quite like this one.  600€ a month is too much for me; much as I’d like to tap into my inner Carrie Bradshaw and live alone and mostly fabulously in the centre of an exciting city.  Though, as I remember, even Bradshaw, in her special whiny way, complained occasionally about the rent.

“How can you save some money, short term?” I asked myself, watching my shopping bags cut into the palms of my hands.

Survive on rice and chicken stock?  Hmmm, no.  I like food.  Not salmon and sirloin mind, but having colour on my plate.  And not eating things that already look as they’ve been chewed and partially digested.

Grow my own veggies?  Yeahhh.  In a little apartment, sure.  Over a year ago, my new year’s resolution had been to find a place with a rooftop terrace, from which to grow fresh herbs (which I’d of course learn how to include in my soon to be awesome cooking).  Rooftop terrace found, five months later the herbs had yet to eventuate.

Keep the lights turned perpetually off, and live under the glow of candlelight?  Sounds wonderful, though romantic though it may be, would not be practical nor ease my already fairly innate jumpity-ness.  Having been brought up in a land where leaves crackle as merrily as one’s morning Rice Bubbles, and a single spark can birth a blaze which wipes crops clean off the face of the earth, fire danger is always a very real thought in my mind as I watch a tealight candle burn in its little metal dish.  Knowing a candle is burning, I can hardly leave the room for a moment, not even to go to the next.  And anyway.  After a trip to “Natura” (Spain’s answer to Australia’s hippy wannabe shop “Tree of Life”), I found that candles are not actually as cheap as they might be.  And with a burning time of 5 hours each, but diameter of…well…30 centimetres…I would need a good 40 in my flat at any one time to light my way.  And the heat they would give off in a Spanish summer isn’t even worth mentioning.

Paying for one person’s inner city existence isn’t a cheap practice.  Smaller packages of food aren’t proportionately smaller in price, and bulk buying isn’t feasible as the produce rots in the refrigerator before one has had a chance to munch through it.  We are hence limited to choosing one of the two options or trying to agree on a wider range of shared food with flatmates.  Some cities have limited this problem for us, making outdoor eating as cheap as it is in your dreams (I’m looking at you, Berlin and your massive Turkish community!).  But others (Hi there Barcelona and Madrid!) haven’t, leaving us to be as creative as possible with our food preparation.

One of my resolutions this year was to be more creative food-wise, while not spending any more money on sustinence.  What will be acomplished will be interesting, as I am still a little too impressed with myself when I manage to do something simple well – as with my 2007 rice success, the first time I made a good white sauce, and the perfect omelette I fashioned moments ago.

My goals therefore, will be:

  • To be able to identify fresh herbs by their leaves
  • To know which should go in the major foods of each continent
  • To be able to think of something more interesting to serve than pizza, beef stirfry or olives and cheese para picar when people come over to eat
  • To enjoy good cheese while not getting as large as said cheese would have me become
  • And to spend no more than 30€ per week on store bought food

Let’s see how we go.

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Notes from a sticky keypad. As in, the keys stick.

19:08 (like in the army)
 
There have been two weeks spent in our fair (pentagonal shaped?) land near France.  I am finally housed, temporarily though gratefully in a little flat decorated so as to embrace everything that should have been forgotten about the seventies.  I share this mission brown heaven with a nervous Peruvian and his more arrogant but thankfully more absent friend.  Each morning, I am greeted by the former wanting to talk and talk and talk.  At this point, clad only in pjs and the sleep from my eyes, I want nothing more than to shuffle past him and splash some overly calcified tap water onto my face…but he’s just so ‘i want to learn English’ that this is nearly impossible!  Unfortunately, it’s hard to answer his questions, and he doesn’t really understand mine…so our is a mutually unbeneficial relationship.
 
Before I was employed and housed, I walked everywhere and saved on food (and health) by surviving on pasta, tinned tomatos and the included breakfast of white bread and cake (yes) at my hostel.  Now that both issues have been rectified, I can afford the metro, and so no longer fall out of my skinny jeans with each step (though part of me found that mildly enjoyable!).  So while I have yet cooked only one decent meal during my stay here, I have been kept fed due to the fact that my work backs onto a Subway store which is under the same management.  I am averaging 2m of sandwhich per week.  A statistic that both pleases and disgusts me.
 
Employment has it’s benefits as follows:
* i get to enjoy the fact that blonde hair is a relative novelty in Spain
* i now mildly understand the rules of rugby
* the blank, non-English speaking cook gives me lessons in loosing my ‘whitest girl on earth reputation’ via handshakes and Spanish ‘wat up dawg’ style gibberish
* i can rank the world’s nationalities in terms of rudeness (surprisingly, Ireland needs to work harder)
* there is a motorbike above the bar, which causes me great amusement
* the look from people when I tell them I’m Australian and the never failing ‘why are you here?’ that follows is even more amusing
 
And negatives.
* i certainly cannot carry a platter laden with four plates atop my shoulder while effectively unfolding a serving table without causing serious alarm and possible arrest
* i have to wear an unattractive t shirt
 
All is well in this land.  Dogs run free on the metro, human castles and street-long fire fights are staged to celebrate local saints’ days, girls have shaven mullets, verbs are conjugated 18 different ways and the change in temperature (I can only imagine) has caused a 10c piece sized section of skin on my right shoulder to scab, heal and rescab with rampant abandon.
 
I hope you are chirpy and delicious.

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Roadside medicine

Living in Barcelona means many things.  Being amazed everytime you look at the Sagrada Familia.  Sitting in plazas nursing a coffee and laughing at the tourists who continually fall down what to you is a very obvious  stone step.  Being chastised for beginning a night out at the ungodly early hour of 1am.  Watching old men ride bikes while smoking cigars.  Speaking Spanish.  Mildly understanding Catalan.  Living near mountain and sea.

Ultimately, however, it means becoming accustomed to being harassed in the street by night.  Or day.  Or twilight.  It means walking along with you bag under your jacket and your bank card stuffed down your bra (the theory being that you would surely notice if someone stole it from there!).  It means listening to the *ppsssssssttt* sound that emits from the mouths nearby leering street urchins (a sound which apparently is translates as ’Hi obviously naive foreigner, why don’t you come and talk to us a bit?’, but really, just sounds like someone rudely calling their dog to them).

Last night, on the way to meet a friend, I experienced one such – mild – encounter.  A car, slowing down beside me, and the driver emiting the now well-known chalkboard-scraping *pppsssstttt*.  I ignored him.  A further *ppsssssstttt* combined with an ‘Oye!’ made me turn to see what was up with this dude.  The Colombian, as I believe him to have been, wanted directions to Plaza del Sol; a plaza which any idiot, no matter how drunk, or how new to Barcelona, would know wasn’t in El Raval.  He seemed unimpressed that I couldn’t direct him through this suburb very well, as the streets are mostly one-way’ and dismissed my directions from the main road completely.  He wanted, it seemed, to talk about my eyes.

‘And so…go along that road and ask someone there for…’

‘Yeah, yeah.  Do you know what?  Your eyes are full of negative energy.’

I look at him incredulously.  I was in the middle of negotiating direction-giving in Spanish, which is something that I should never be trusted to do in English.

‘Oh yes?’

‘Yeah, the white part isn’t clear.  It’s not clean.  It’s full of negative energy, it’s really bad.’

‘Well, that’s just excellent for me then isn’t it?’

It was clear that he didn’t get sarcasm.  He looked at me blankly.  A little maliciously.

‘I was in Brazil, they taught me how to recognise and clear negative energy.  And yours is terrible’

It was my time to look at him blankly.  Even a little maliciously.  Of ourse I didn’t look like a bowl of icecream.  I was talking to a weirdo alone at 11pm, hands gripping my bag lest he grab it and speed off.

‘I’ll do it for you.’

‘Ahhh.  No thanks.’

‘Why not?  Nothing weird.  You did me a favour, and I could return it…’

I was already walking away….

This isn’t much, but did make me question the motives of road side medicine men in general.  In Thailand several years ago, I was travelling with a friend when we came across a small, tanned, leathery fellow in Koh Phangnan.  This island, famed for the monthly Moon Festival, is a veritable mixed bag of odd sorts, and so the site of this guy wasn’t anything particularly special.  However, his brand of introduction was.

He was, it seemed, a medicine man.  The details elude me somewhat (I had participated in a vodka bucket or two before meeting him, and years have passed since), but the essence was that he was able to remove bad spirits and energy from people.  A lengthy sort of self-promotion followed, through which we learned that he had a room (I guess we could call it a practice) conveniently nearby.  Ahhh.  No thanks.  We were far from home, counting our little bahts and not willing to spend then on the questionable skills of a leathery medicine man sitting on a rock in downtown Koh Phagnan.

Fast forward a week.  Anita and I had met the group we’d be travelling to the Golden Triangle with, and are enjoying our obiligatory pre-journey bonding party night on Bangkok’s Khaosan Road…when who do we run into, but Mr Medicine.  While our new friends wait nearby, we ask him a few questions of the small-talk variety ‘How’d you get here so fast?’ ‘Why are you here?’ ’Where’d you get that tasty looking fried banana dessert you’re holding?’.  Soon however, he steers the conversation towards his profession, and almost before we’d had a moment to digest what he’s saying, let alone reply, he’d offered us a free mini-on-the-spot-bad-spirit-removal-test, lept over, clamped his mouth over mine and proceeded to suck an entire lungful of air out of my pulmonaries.  A 3-second eternity later, with the leathery man removed, I was left to recompensate my breathlessness (literally), by quickly breathing in a mouthful of sooty Thai air.  The next two minutes alerted us to the fact that the rest of his treatments occured in private, and would involve not only clothing removal, but the placement of withered hands in areas where the sun doesn’t shine .  A German lady had thoroughly enjoyed his treatment, we were assured.

We declined.

We never saw him again, though if he did managed to suck anything evil out of my lungs, I’d like a word or two with it…

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Weather patterns and SMSs

It´s been a week since I arrived back in Barcelona, and I can finally almost claim competence in the art of rugging one’s self up against the cold.  Though I don’t do it as well as the almost spherical pidgeons (so fluffed up are they) that I walk past each day, I can now leave my front door without immediately gasping and hopping straight back over the threshold, ice-block hands sheltering in my satchel.  I arrived back to a naked city (in the sense of course of leafless trees rather than clothesless people!) whose criss-crossed streets seemed suddenly wider, pinker, emptier, after having been stripped of the canopies provided by their avenues of straight trees.

After the culture-slamming shock of exchanging 35 degree humidity and broad Australian accents for 8 degrees and a reminder that I would have to work on my Spanish, I retreated indoors for a day or two to recover from jetlag and psych myself up for the job hunt that promised to chase my curriculum-laden self through the streets for the next few weeks.  This served my need for rest well, and many an odd dream played through my mind…but upon awakening, my status as an informed citizen of the city proved somewhat questionable.  Having emerged bleary-eyed from my hibernation, I was rather embarassed to discover the extent of my ignorance regarding the wretched weather Barcelona – or really, Spain – had been suffering…and will here admit that yes, I was actually informed of the howling gale outside my window not by my own eyes, no, but by an sms sent to me by my father in Australia.  I was sleeping deeply you see, and sleeping deeply is something that I do very, very well.  Very well.  In normal circumstances; let alone flying and waiting and eating and scratching and stretching on delayed flights for 45 hours straight.  I returned said sms with another, whose relaxed air (‘yes, of course, the weather’s fine, no i’m not hurt, why should I be?’) breathed a sort of  confused, yet nonchalant unflappability which continued until I turned on the news that night to learn that four children outside the city had died when the small stadium in which they were playing baseball in fell on them under the pressing magnitude of 200km/hr winds.

This is a city in which it’s easy to forget ones self …never more so than when you have just arrived back in it.  It’s an anthill, a rabbit warren in those images’ realest sense.  A seething mass of humanity surviving, sometimes only just, in a series of vastly different, yet strangely identical neighbourhoods.  Tiny streets divide crumbling buildings upon which precariously pegged fluroescent washing hangs on for dear life.  Old ladies walk in twos, the same fur coats and slash of red lipstick that once attracted their long dead husbands still adorning their faces and bodies as they did 50 years ago.  The language is screamed, shot out of mouths like metallic, verbal bullets.  Bottles of beer sit finished upon terrace tables at 8am, not from the night before, but from the morning just entered.  I’ve returned, but it seems that my physical self, or my…something…is still following me; perhaps still sitting, waiting and wondering on the 6 hour delayed flight that brought the rest of me here.  I hope that it – whatever it is that is yet to arrive - is making itself at home on that plane: ordering itself another (this time unecessary) bottle of sparkling, going nuts with its teeny-tiny personal television and laughing quietly at the compartmentalised dinner it’s being served…because when it arrives here…I’m going to need it shiny, polished, glittery golden and ready to go.

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